Acronyms Can Really Obviously Negate Your Motive

Chris French enters his apartment and is startled to find his friends Albert Dutch, Beth English and David Dijibouti waiting for him.

Albert: Chris, we need to talk.

Beth: This is an intervention.

David: It’s about your store’s name.

Chris: Chris French Cleaners?  What’s wrong with that?

Albert: Don’t you see?

Chris
French
Cleaners

CFC!

Beth: That stands for chlorofluorocarbons.

David: Chloroflurocarbons created the hole in our ozone layer.

Albert: You’ve named your dry cleaning store after a dangerous pollutant!

Beth: It’s too ironic!  It will ruin your business.

Chris: Relax, it’s been that way since 1959.  I’ll be fine.

Albert: That’s what I thought about my failed condom business.

Albert’s
Infectious
Defense
System.

AIDS!

Beth: Yes, and my now-defunct infant furniture store.

Beth’s
Antique
Bassinets.
Yellowing
Merchandise
Unwaveringly
Reliable
Despite
Evident
Repairs.

BABY MURDER!

David: And my out-of-print peaceful New Age philosophy book!

David’s
Altruistic
Theology
Encompassing
Religion
And
Practical
Ethics.
Developed
Reverently
Unto
God’s
Service.

DATE RAPE DRUGS!

Chris: But you guys worked so hard creating ironic acronyms that you were clearly more interested in being clever than being successful.

Anthony: Oh, good point.

Beth: Yeah, I never even cared about babies.

David: Now I regret changing my name from Hank.

Oscars In Memoriam: Movie Extras

Because there are no small roles.

The latest from my UCB team, The Brig.  If there’s one thing I learned from this, it’s that I enjoy writing cheesy awards intros way too much.  Keep that in mind, next year’s Oscars producer.

Matt Mayer and I directed it, Nathan Russell shot it, and I edited it.  Matt Fisher plays Rick Moranis.

Farming Award

This is the saddest thing I’ve ever seen on Facebook.

Takin’ Care of Business: The Musical

It’s every single Bachman-Turner Overdrive hit song, on Broadway!

Takin’ Care of Business

The latest from my UCB team, The Brig.

Jon Gutierrez wrote this one,  I directed it, Nathan Russell shot and edited it, and Mike Costabile and I did the animation.  But the real hero on this shoot was our producer Mackenzie Condon who called every theater in New York City to find us place to shoot after our first theater didn’t work out, and organized getting 16 extras for a 1 second joke at the end.

Cast, in order of appearance

Narrator: Dan Hodapp

Mamma: Jessica Stickles

Bachman: John Murray

Turner: Jamison Guest

Sally Overdrive: Amber Petty

Audience 1: Rob Webber

Audience 2 and 3: Erik Dies and Molly Lloyd

Audience 4: Patrick Clair

Dora the Asphyxiated

On the next episode of Dora the Explorer, Dora learns she’s a thalidomide baby and suffocates herself.

5 dollar haircuts

Imagine how much cheaper a haircut would be if they eliminated redundancies.

Numbalex: Depressed Yet?

Here’s the latest from my UCB video team, The Brig.

Numbalex: Depressed Yet?

I wrote it, Matt Mayer directed it and Nathan Russell shot and edited it.

This was an easy concept to pitch but a really difficult one to write (It’s hard to find facts you can state in a single sentence that are depressing, but in context make the commercial’s point of view funny and not just depressing).  I did a first draft that was all over the place in terms of tone and approach, and the rest of the team really helped me refine and organize the idea.  Also, my favorite line (about marriage) comes courtesy of Crystal Delahanty.

Stupid Mr. Pibb

Mr. Pibb, you’ll never become a doctor if you keep misspelling “extra.”

The great blizzard of 2010

I apologize in advance for blowing your mind.

Google: Parisian Oops

Here’s the latest from my UCB Beta team, The Brig

Google: Parisian Oops

Zack Phillips e-mailed us this idea fully formed and then within about 2 hours Nathan Russell (director) and Matt Mayer (editor) made it.  I think it came out fantastic.